Vocabulary Highlights & Grammar Tips Archives

You might actually learn to love them, or already do! Let’s jump right into commas with these 7 fun examples.

1. Check out this sentence…

Sentence: “Lucy, it’s Emma. Is this a good time to talk? I just got your email message asking me to call.”

Does this sentence need a comma?
A comma after message, perhaps?

No, because the message, the word just before the word asking, is the word that is performing the action of the –ing verb. The message is asking. This one might be a tad tricky, but I think we can safely omit the comma here.
Although, do emails ask questions? Ah, bah, forget it!

2. Next up…

Sentence: “I know she was disappointed losing to the other team.”

Where’s the comma go?
Hmmm…
None needed, at least not necessarily. This one is borderline, and I try not to overdue the use of commas. But you could also try something like what follows. Sometimes rewording the sentence for clarity is the best way.

“I know she was disappointed, about losing to the other team, that is.”
Or…
“Emma was disappointed, as losing to another team was completely new to her.”
Or…
“Emma was disappointed. She lost to the other team.”

3. Next one.

Sentence(s):
Jake said, “She’ll be working primarily with… yes, a clown.”
“A clown, that really goofy one we saw yesterday, right?” Lucy replied giggling. “No, please, say it isn’t so!”

Can you find it? Where’s the missing comma?
Well…
It goes after replied. Here’s the fixed example: Lucy replied, giggling.

Here are some other correct examples…
Lucy said, still giggling.
Lucy said, not showing her disdain for that ugly clown.
Lucy said, and then she did an about-face and marched away.
Lucy jumped, trying to reach the shoes hanging from the clothesline.

And finally, just a few more…
“Why am I not surprised?” Glenn said, laughing.
“What?” Joe blurted, shocked.
“Why?” Joe asked, pondering just why, why, why in the freakin’, hootin’ tarnation!

4. Another example…

Sentence: “Lucy darling, come here and meet Richard.”

Need a comma anywhere?
Can you spot it?
Well, the comma goes after Lucy, because her name isn’t Lucy Darling.
This is the corrected example: “Lucy, darling, come here and meet Richard.”

Here are some other correct examples…
“Lucy, you overblown airbag, come here and meet your new attitude coach, Richard.”
“Lucy, what in the world? Why did you let Richard treat you like that?”
“Did you hear me, Lucy? Did you hear what I said?”

And super simply, even…
“Hi, Jack!”
“Oh, my!”
“Yes, Mother, dear…”
“Oh, hey, Martha! What’s up?”
“Ah, not much. Just writer’s block again…”

5. Yet another…

Sentence: “Of course,” I said, with a smile.

Does it need the comma after said, this time?
Nope. Not necessarily, but…
Pay attention to the flow of your story, the attitude, every detail as you feel it. Do you need emphasis, speed, or less emphasis on something.

For emphasis, you may want to use the comma, such as in this fixed-up example…

“Why don’t you serve us a drink, Nancy, then bring your cute self over here and join us.” Rob winked after he said it, with that same sinister look in his eyes.
“Of course,” I said, with a smile—this time. But under my breath I cursed the day I met that asshole!

6. One more…

Sentence: “Hey, love birds, there is phone service in South America you know.”

Where’s the comma go?
Well, it goes after South America, like this…
“Hey, love birds, there is phone service in South America, you know.”

Other correct examples…
“Hey, wouldn’t you like to know, dumb ass?”
“I need to get going, by the way?”
“It looks a little undercooked, if you ask me.”
“If you would like to see what’s under there, I can show you. But beware, you can never take back this sight!”

7. Okay, now this is the last one! (Clauses, the best for last!)

Sentence: He shined his flashlight around the room illuminating everything he looked at.

Where does the comma go?
And yes, it really needs one!

The comma goes after room, because the room is not doing the illuminating.
Tip: if the -ing verb is not performing the action for the noun directly before it, then use a comma to separate the clauses.
The first clause contains the flashlight, and the -ing word does not directly follow flashlight. So, imagine drawing an arrow all the way from flashlight, to its action-performing -ing verb. Whenever you need to draw an arrow, use a comma.
I hope that explains clauses and commas in a simple, layman’s-term kind of way.

The corrected sentence is as follows…
He shined his flashlight around the room, illuminating everything he looked at.

And here are some more corrected examples…

Wrong. It was sending out pulses of energy rippling across the ocean surface.
Fixed. It was sending out pulses of energy, rippling across the ocean surface.
Why? Because it was rippling across the ocean, not the energy. Notice, you have to draw an arrow from it, to the -ing word.

Wrong. Bolts of lightning were erupting in the clouds electrifying for everything for miles.
Fixed. Bolts of lightning were erupting in the clouds, electrifying for everything for miles.
Why? Because the bolts were electrifying things, not the clouds. Arrow needed.

Last one, and notice the difference, as you’ll see this a lot…
Wrong. With waves crashing all around us, we dove into the cave barely escaping the water’s destructive forces.
Fixed. With waves crashing all around us, we dove into the cave, barely escaping the water’s destructive forces.
Why? Because the cave didn’t escape the the chaotic water, we did. Notice the word barely. You’ll see this with words such as still, even, almost, etc. So, be on the look out. Soon your brain will separate clauses without even thinking. And reading, absorbing the words and their meaning, will become just that much more clear.

Final tip. Read. Read a lot. Become hyper aware of commas, and clauses. And, if you have the money, consider hiring a proofreader. You’ll learn boatloads, for it’s not just about the proofreading of your work, it’s about your future, a way to continue your learning! And perhaps, it’ll be a fast-track for your learning!

Now, I’m not affiliated, but if you are looking for a proofreader, I would recommend heading over to wordrefiner.com. Check out Mark Schultz, “the man,” and the wonderful services he has to offer. Mark is a blast to work with!

Thanks for reading. I hope this has helped your understanding of commas.

But, there’s more, much more. As I continue to read I’ll pluck out more random examples concerning the use of commas, and then make another blog post in the future. Feel free to subscribe below if you’d like to get an email when I create something new here.

~Travis Borne

Today’s tips for writers. Let’s talk about the ellipsis, em dash, semicolon and colon, and—the incomplete sentence.

I’m going to keep these, which are my personal guidelines, simple, a deviance from my sometimes turgid, flowery, or overblown prose. Many of you already know this, or choose to have your own style with these, and that is perfectly okay as far as I’m concerned. This is how I roll. And this post is not meant to be comprehensive. I’ve included a few tips here, so use the advice however you like.

The semicolon.

Attach two complete sentences when using the semicolon; this is the general rule.

Separate items in a list, after following the colon. Use a semicolon for this only when the following items contain commas within themselves, or, if it would be ambiguous not to separate them in a more clearly defined manner.

Take it easy with semicolons, dude. Relax… Semicolons are a turnoff for some readers. So, use semicolons sparingly. Many writers choose to simply end their sentence, a complete one or an incomplete one, with a period.

Learn the subtle difference of using a semicolon, verses simply ending the sentence with a period and starting another. And do this, by reading, and writing. Write, write!

Sprinkle them in for some variety. Never, do not ever use semicolons, for it’s another of the myriad ways to add spice to your prose. Use your complete toolbox for more punching power. But as stated previously, do use these rarely. Perhaps, only one or two per chapter.

Extra bonus. The incomplete sentence! Also, use your incomplete sentences sparingly! I think incomplete sentences are fantastic, and another clever way to add variety. As a general rule, though, no more than one incomplete sentence per five-to-ten complete ones; although, this can vary greatly. Exceptions. Sometimes you need more emphasis, some of that punching power I mentioned earlier. Read the following example:
Joe is not a very nice guy. In fact, he totally stinks! No deodorant. Always farts. Never showers. Eats too much. He is a total slob!

But. Reading one incomplete sentence. After another. After another. Endlessly. That is a turn off. Go back and fix your prose!

The colon.

The colon means there’s something coming, whoooo… Spooky. Muahahaha! Some information: something is to follow!

Sometimes, but not all of the time, a list of things on the way! It could very well, be just one thing. Example:
Dick R. Jones farted: it stunk like a skunk.
Rick D. Jones, his brother, barfed: carrots, milky bile, and could it be—gasoline? At least, that’s how it smelled: like a corpse, like a dude who’d been soaking in stale gasoline; one who, had been boiled in it!

Rule. Always make sure the sentence before a colon is a complete one. I follow this strictly—for clarity, and to further justify my use of the colon—for if it’s not, I go with a comma or period instead.

Use sparingly, just like the semicolon, perhaps even more sparingly.

Test for you! Would you use a colon in this example (after ‘added’):
Jack Blackenstack spoke for hours. I almost wanted to get up and walk out—or yell at him to, “SHUT THE FUCK UP!” Then finally, he finished, adding: “That’ll be all, folks!” And then he, so tersely and rudely, just walked out!
I wouldn’t use a colon there, although many people do. Unless you are going to make that your personal style, then generally, instead, I would roll like this: ...he finished, adding, “That’ll be all, folks!”

Here’s another example of using a colon, and an incidence where you may want to use a semicolon as the separator:
Jessie found more fossils than Gary, Michelle, and Sally: at least 10 sand dollars, old ones from at least 50,000 B.C.; a broken, brown dinosaur tooth; and, she even found an entire triceratops!

The ellipsis.

Use for a brief pause. Example:
Jerry is going to the…on second thought, he ain’t goin’ nowhere!

Or: Jerry is going to the… on second thought, he ain’t going nowhere.

I like the first example. I think it looks cleaner, and it leaves open the option to add the space when you need it; this way, you get more out of this cool special character. Language rocks! Roll how you want on this, though.

Use the ellipsis to end a sentence, paragraph, chapter, or even an entire novel.

An ellipsis can provide a sense of mystery, that something is about to happen. Spooky again! Tiptoes!
Example 1:
He strolled out the door, turned at the sidewalk, and then all hell broke loose…
Example 2:
It never happens like that, like, in the movies, and this, this final sockdolager; that was the final straw. And then Edwin H. Rubble turned his head, somberly, looking away from the mocking audience…
Example 3:
The spider grew larger. It was not over, NOT BY FAR, and it kept on growing, and growing, and GROWING…

STRICT RULE! Do not use an ellipsis for interruptions! Example:
“Jess, why don’t you just…”
“No, Mom!” Jess interrupted, blaring. “I will NOT shut up. Not this time! And things are going to be different around here, starting right now or I am putting you in the old-folk’s home!”
Now, I repeat. Do not use an ellipsis for interruptions! Use the em dash, emphasis dash, or “double dash,”—whatever you want to call it—instead!

Another example. Use the em dash, not the ellipsis, like this:
“I am not going to the old-folk’s home, and it you even try—”
“I said shut up, Mom—” Jess made a fist and her face became a ripe tomato. “—and I mean it! You shut up right now, or I’ll gonna put you in one myself—with this!” Her fist was a white-knuckle thunderstorm, and Mom finally ceded. TIP: Notice the how I used the em dashes to break the dialog, allowing a perfect spot for a plain ol’ sentence!

Use the ellipsis very sparingly. Perhaps…more sparingly than the semicolon and colon, in that particular order.

Never, do not use the ellipsis. It is another way to spice up your prose, Use everything ya got!

Travis Borne's grammar lesson: the em dash

The magnificent em dash!

I love it—and sometimes people say I use the em dash too much!

Use the em dash! Use it as much as you like. But as with anything, you can still overdo it. Don’t. Find a balance that works for you, and don’t piss off your readers. Or do, it that’s how you roll! (sinister chuckles, coming from—somewhere!)

Use the “em” dash when you want to “emphasize” what’s next. Example:
And then it hit me—I’ll never be able to play dodgeball again! Yes! Because I never want to!

Use the em dash to signify a pause in dialog or prose. Example:
“Johnny—please, please, don’t do that to me anymore,” Elizabeth sobbed.
“But, Liz—I, I thought—I thought you liked it when I gave you a booty rub?”
“I—I do—” Liz’s stutter seemed as if a ghost was punching her in the back. “—it’s just that… Oh, forget it, you know I was talking about what you did after my booty rub!”

Use an em dash for interruptions, NOT the ellipsis!

Use the em dash like you would parenthesis, too. I think parenthesis are ugly, so I use them less than any of the above. But, I do use them. Strictly, I adhere to the following of my #1 rule. Use everything in your toolbox! This keeps the reader off guard, never totally being able to—figure you out! Here’s an example:
Johnny Knickernacker sucked his thumb—his toes, his lollypops, and his fingernails clean too—but he always managed to remain as healthy as someone who never sucked, anything!

And that’s it folks. Hope you enjoyed this post. I’m out, just like Jack Blackenstack!

Subscribe if ya want more, or read Lenders. Or drop a thank-you or screw-you bomb on my ass!
~Travis Borne

Commas. I love them. I hate them. I can’t understand them! 7 quick, fun and enlightening comma usage examples. Post #1.

You might actually learn to love them, or already do! Let’s jump right into commas with these 7 fun examples.

~Travis Borne

Start your quantum transmissions! Subscribe to Travis Borne's Blog:

Travis Borne’s daily writing tips: #1

Today’s tips for writers. Let’s talk about the ellipsis, em dash, semicolon and colon, and—the incomplete sentence.

And that’s it folks. Hope you enjoyed this post. I’m out, just like Jack Blackenstack!

Start your quantum transmissions! Subscribe to Travis Borne's Blog: